Suave: “So, the Drunken Luchadors take the first match of the night with a win over PCW’s The Goatbusters. Back with more action right after this.
Live from the EnergySolutions Arena in Salt Lake City, Utah
Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009
SLAUGHTER TELEVISION TAPING
Zero vs Michael Byrd
Marshall vs. Johnny Legend
eGG Bandits vs. chicKEN Chokers
Tag Team Championship
Match #2
Aquina la Amazon de Amiga- PMWF Women’s Champion vs.
Jill-Berg- Missouri Valley Wrestling
Kimber in the ring. Kimber: “Our second match is a one fall, thirty-minute time limit. Coming out first… weighing in at 95 pounds, from Financial District of New York City, she is the phenomenon known as- Jill-Berg!”
THUMP
THUMP
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP
THUMP
THUMP
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP
The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.
Policeman: “Ms. Berg. It’s time.”
The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding a petite woman and her male assistant in the middle. Jill-Berg is busy talking on her cell phone while Jerry, the male assistant, furiously scribbles down notes as the group makes their way towards the ring.
THUMP
THUMP
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP
The procession emerges from the back and starts their way down the ramp.
Her assistant has a microphone and a portable tape recorder. He flips it on.
“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”
The group then continues towards the ring leaving the police escort behind.
“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”
The bodyguards assist Ms. Berg into the ring. She, Jerry, and two bodyguards immediately go to a corner.
“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”
Berg continues to talk on her cell phone.
“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”
Kimber: “And her opponent is the Women’s Champion from the Puerto de Macoris Wrestling Federation! AQUINA LA AMAZON DE AMIGA!”
Aquina strides to the ring. She’s considerably taller than the petite Jill Berg.
Tessa: “Holy cow. She’s taller than McGill.”
Suave: “Six foot four, two hundred pounds of Aquina la Amazon de Amiga versus the phoenomenon known as Jill-Berg.”
(Bell sounds)
Aquina smiles and walks forward. She’s met by two of Berg’s bodyguards. She chops one and sends him flying out of the ring. She chops the second one and whip him over the top rope. Aquina continues forward.
Suave: “Aquina rolled right over Berg’s first wave of bodyguards as if they were nothing more than a speed bump.”
Berg peeks up and sees Aquina advancing. She waves the second group of bodyguards forward. They charge…Aquina sticks her big boot up and knocks out one. Karate chop to the second one sends him reeling up and over the top rope. Berg peeks up a second time. She waves Jerry, her personal assistant forward.
Suave: “Jerry seems a little surprised at the request. Aquina grabs him from behind…OOOH! Chokeslam. Now there’s no one in between-…WAIT! REIKA!”
Rieka Kisuargi, Berg’s latest corporate acquisition, runs in from behind and leaps on Aquina’s back.
Suave: “SLEEPER! RIEKA HAS AQUINA IN A SLEEPER HOLD!”
Berg calmly puts her phone away and then hits a spinning kick to Aquina’s left knee. Then she whips to the right and kicks the right knee. Aquina drops to her knees. Spinning heel kick to the chin by Berg. Aquina topples forward. Rieka puts the Aquina in an inverted facelock, and hooks her near arm with his free arm. She pulls backwards and up and wrenches Aquina’s neck.
Suave: “DRAGON SLEEPER! DRAGON SLEEPER!”
Tessa: “I hate to admit it, but Berg’s plan has been brutally efficient.”
Berg delivers a second spinning heel kick that finishes the job. Rieka and Berg push Aquina over. Berg covers. 1…2…3.
WINNER: Jill-Berg
Suave: “Brutally efficient is right. Jill-Berg destroys the Puerto de Macoris Women’s champion and the crowd ain’t the least bit happy about it.”
The crowd, enraged at Berg’s tactics, begins to throw debris into the ring.
BACKSTAGE
Charlie Blackwell sits in his dressing room reviewing tape of his opponent with his fiancee Kenzie Blair. Both Kenzie and Charlie’s face looks white as a ghost. Dawn McGill enters.
Dawn: “Charlie? What’s wrong?
Charlie: “Have you seen this?”
Dawn: “No, not really. Why?”
Charlie: “Look!”
Blackwell’s opponent, Yamamoto Tanaka, is on the tape. Tanaka clobbers his opponent with a forearm and then takes him to the top turnbuckle. He then hits a top rope Canadian Destroyer and pins his man. Then paramedics hit the ring and defibrillate his opponent.
Charlie: “DAWN?”
Dawn: “Don’t worry, Charlie. That’s just one match.”
Another Tanaka match comes on. Same result. Top rope Canadian Destroyer. Pin. Paramedics. The match following has the same sequence of events.
Dawn: “Well, at least no one’s died from one his matches.”
Charlie: “That’s not the point! Dawn…”
Dawn: “Dude, do you want to be a wrestler or not?”
Charlie: “But-”
Dawn: “But nothing. You figure it out.”
Dawn leaves. Kenzie comforts Charlie.
Match #3
Charlie Blackwell- Dream Wrestling Federation vs.
Yamamoto Tanaka- PMWF Champion
*Opening notes to Charlie Robison’s ‘My Hometown’ play*
Charlie walks down to the ring with his valet/girlfriend Kenzie Blair.
Suave: “And here comes Dream Wrestling Federation’s Charlie Blackwell. He’s a very young wrestler and owns an upset win over Upton Osgood in his brief career.”
“Well, I had a buddy back in eighty-one
And we made ourselves a pact
We were heading for the new pipeline
And we were never coming back
We worked eighty hours working time and a half
But LaGrange was too damn hot
We drove back home at the end that week
And we spent it all on shots…”
Charlie holds the ring ropes open for Kenzie to slide through.
“So I’ll see you Houston
If I ever get out that way
I’ll see you in Dallas
But I won’t have long to stay
If you’re ever out west son
And you’re feeling like slowin’ down
I’ll see you around
Around my hometown…”
Kimber Marshall in the ring.
Kimber: “Our next match is a one fall, thirty minute time limit. Already in the ring with his valet Kenzie Blair, from Homer, Michigan, Charlie Blackwell!”
Muted applause for young Blackwell.
Kimber: “And his opponent…”
The ballroom goes black.
Kimber: “Weighing in at three hundred and fifteen pounds. He is the Japanese Destruction Machine and the Puerto de Macoris Heavyweight Champion! YAMAMOTO…TANAKA!”
A spotlight illuminates a small area in the back of the ball room where Tanaka makes his entrance followed by paramedics and a portable defibrillator. He stops and glares at Blackwell who seems geniunely worried in the ring.
Suave: “Oh my…”
Tessa: “Run Charlie, run!”
Tanaka stomps to the ring. Kenzie quickly bails. Charlie has a deer in the headlights expression. Tanaka charges. Charlie ducks just in time as Tanaka’s arm whizzes by above. Charlie scrambles between Tanaka’s legs and rolls to the other side of the ring. He gets up and charges Tanaka before he can get turned around and begins flailing away at him.
Suave: “I’m not sure that’s a very good idea.”
Tanaka lifts Blackwell up by the throat with two hands and slams him to the mat.
Suave: “And I was right.”
Tanaka drags Blackwell to the corner. One chop. Two chop. The third sends Charlie up and over the top turnbuckle. Tanaka climbs to the top turnbuckle. Flying elbow nearly snaps Blackwell in half. Stomps by Tanaka. Kenzie comes up and shoves Tanaka from behind.
Tessa: “What the hell does she think she’s doing?”
Tanaka, amused, begins to chase Kenzie around the ring. Blackwell is still doubled up and rolling on the floor. Kenzie grabs her purse and leaps onto the ring apron and rolls under the ropes into the ring. Tanaka slides underneath the ropes and corners Kenzie.
Suave: “Oh, no.”
Tanaka grabs Kenzie by the throat. Kenzie desperately whips her purse around and clocks Tanaka in the head. Surprisingly, Tanaka releases her and staggers back.
Crowd: “RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
Suave: “I DON’T BELIEVE IT! SHE STAGGERED TANAKA! WHAT DOES KENZIE BLAIR HAVE IN THAT PURSE?”
Kenzie winds up again and connects with a second purse shot that spins Tanaka around.
Crowd: “RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
Suave: “AGAIN! KENZIE IS FIGHTING OFF TANAKA!”
Now super confident, Kenzie winds up a third time and swings the purse towards Tanaka. He ducks. The purse misses. Tanaka leaps forward and tackles Kenzie, crushing her below him.
Crowd: “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!”
Suave: “HOLY CRAP! TANAKA LANDED SMACK DAB ON TOP OF KENZIE BLAIR! SHE’S OUT!”
A pissed off Tanaka grabs Kenzie by the hair and takes her up to the top turnbuckle. The paramedics at ringside power up the defibrillator. Tanaka puts Kenzie in position for the Destroyer.
Crowd: “RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
Suave: “WHAT’S GOING ON? IT’S DAWN McGILL!”
McGill and her Singapore cane run in from behind Tanaka. She swings as hard as she can and connects on Tanaka’s scrotum. His eyes suddenly bulge and he drops Kenzie.
Suave: “HOLY CRAP! SINGAPORE CANE TO THE TESTICULAR REGION BY McGILL!”
Tanaka stays frozen in place on the top turnbuckle. McGill climbs up quickly and turns Tanaka around. She begins to lift as if to do a powerbomb and then slams Tanaka to the ground, digging her shoulder into his stomach.
Suave: “BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! McGill climbs out and pulls Blackwell back into the ring. I don’t believe it! McGill puts Blackwell on top of Tanaka. Cover. One. Two. THREE!”
Tessa: “I don’t believe it.”
Suave: “CHARLIE BLACKWELL HAS JUST PULLED OFF A HUGE UPSET OVER PMWF CHAMPION YAMAMOTO TANAKA!”
Dawn pulls Kenzie out of the ring. Tanaka begins to come around.
Dawn: “RUN!”
Charlie takes one look at the stirring Tanaka and sprints to the back. Kenzie has to be drug back by McGill.
BACKSTAGE
Paige McGillicutty
Paige: “Paige McGillicutty here. One of our featured performers here tonight, ‘The Hellcat’ Kirsta Lewis, spent a couple weeks at Missouri Valley Wrestling working with the younger workers a few weeks back. The time she spent at MVW was short. but the impact is still being felt.”
MVW wrestlers Sabrina James and Alicia Rowe aka…’The Pinups’ appear on screen.
Sabrina: “Oh yeah. I think I learned, we learned more in those two weeks working with Kirsta than we did in the previous year. She was very easy to work with.”
Cut to a quick shot of Kirsta working with James and Rowe.
Alicia: “Very easy.”
Sabrina: “Oh yes. Her reputation tends to precede herself but she was nothing but gracious and personable while she was here.”
Paige: “MVW CEO Jason Carmondy also has nothing but high praise for Lewis.”
Carmondy: “Yeah, I had heard through some channels that Kirsta was looking to take a couple weeks off her extremely busy schedule. We reached out to her and I was very pleasantly surprised when she took us up on our offer. Kirsta was a very positive influence on several of our younger wrestlers here and the time they got to spend with someone who’s at the top of her profession you cannot even begin to put a value to.”
Paige: “In the end, it was in the ring where Kirsta’s influence shone through.
Replay: The Pinups (Sabrina James and Alicia Rowe) vs. The Inconvenient Truth (NoCal Mal and Bettina Schultz w/Totally Gore Bryan Horg)
…Off the ropes, hip toss by NoCal Mal. A clothesline follows and then rights. Off the ropes, kick by NoCal Mal, knee buster and then a neck breaker gets 2. Tag to Schultz, rights to James, off the ropes and a boot by NoCal Mal, neck breaker by Schultz and a cover for 2. James pokes Schultz in the eyes, Rowe tags in and slams Schultz to the corner. Chops by Rowe, right to NoCal Mal and then more chops to Schultz. Schultz fires back, eye rake by Rowe and then a shoulder block. Schultz with the elbows, knee drop and a cover for 2. Tag to NoCal Mal, DOUBLE SUPLEX! They toss James. Baseball slide by NoCal Mal, Schultz out as well and they brawl ringside. NoCal Mal and Rowe back in the ring, James trips up NoCal Mal and pulls her to the floor. Slams her to the barricade, and rolls her back in. Belly to belly by Rowe, and a cover for 2……
……Carbon Footprint try stopped, James tosses NoCal Mal, flatliner to Schultz by Rowe and she covers for a close 2. Rowe recliner on Schultz, she fights out, pulls Rowe into James, roll up by Schultz gets 2. NoCal Mal spits red mist into Rowe’s eyes, ref down, Carbon Footprint on Rowe! The ref is clearing his eyes, and then covers for 2 as James pulls her to the floor. James says NoCal Mal did it. The ref takes NoCal Mal to her corner, Ax kick to Schultz, Rowe rolls her up and they win.
Suave: “Thanks Paige. More WWR Supershow II right after this.”
